NYT best-selling author MaryJanice Davidson is back with her first collection of crochet patterns! A SWIFT KICK IN THE CROCHET is a hilarious ride through MaryJanice's journey from "a dumb person who is dumb and can't crochet because of all the dumb" to an experienced crafter who designs her own patterns. With easy-to-follow patterns, photos, links, resources, hilarious anecdotes, and book excerpts, Davidson's K.I.S.S. method (Keep It Simple Sweetie) is perfect for beginners as well as experts. Don't crochet and don't want to learn? You'll still get a kick out of Davidson's self-deprecating journey from a crochet-less pandemic lockdown to A SWIFT KICK IN THE CROCHET.Already know how to crochet and you've drowned everyone you know in scarves and washcloths? MaryJanice also includes a list of charitable organizations that welcome crocheted items, such as Warm Up America (crochet blankets for women's shelters), Knots Of Love (beanies and blankets for chemo patients and NICU babies), Crochet For Cancer, Project Linus, etc.So check out A SWIFT KICK IN THE CROCHET, figuratively. Or, if you're reading this in a library, literally!Patterns My (Moby) Dick, the washcloth MJ could never finishClassy-ass placematSuper cool ribbed scarfSleek, stylish purse. Like, SEX AND THE CITY stylishCozy lapghan (too small for an afghan, too big for a lap blanket = lapghan)Quickie Coasters; if you don't care about protecting your table, you can whip 'em at your enemies like little flying saucersShawls aren't just for grandmas triangle shawlFingerless gloves, because sometimes you want gloves but not fingersSupercool pet bandana (like there are any other kind of pet bandanas?)