Sociopath: A Memoir
Patric Gagne
A fascinating, revelatory memoir revealing the author’s struggle to come to terms with her own sociopathy and shed light on the often maligned and misunderstood mental disorder. Patric Gagne realized she made others uncomfortable before she started kindergarten. Something about her caused people to react in a way she didn’t understand. She suspected it was because she didn’t feel things the way other kids did. Emotions like fear, guilt, and empathy eluded her. For the most part, she felt nothing. And she didn’t like the way that “nothing” felt. She did her best to pretend she was like everyone else, but the constant pressure to conform to a society she knew rejected anyone like her was unbearable. So Patric stole. She lied. She was occasionally violent. She became an expert lock-picker and home-invader. All with the goal of replacing the nothingness with...something. In college, Patric finally confirmed what she’d long suspected. She was a sociopath. But even though it was the very first personality disorder identified—well over 200 years ago—sociopathy had been neglected by mental health professionals for decades. She was told there was no treatment, no hope for a normal life. She found herself haunted by sociopaths in pop culture, madmen and evil villains who are considered monsters. Her future looked grim. But when Patric reconnects with an old flame, she gets a glimpse of a future beyond her diagnosis. If she’s capable of love, it must mean that she isn’t a monster. With the help of her sweetheart (and some curious characters she meets along the way) she embarks on a mission to prove that the millions of Americans who share her diagnosis aren’t all monsters either. This is the inspiring story of her journey to change her fate and how she managed to build a life full of love and hope.
Your rating:
4/5
i really liked this! i liked how she discussed her feelings of apathy all throughout her life in depth and how she knew she was different from most other people because of that. I also liked the incorporation of learning about psychology as well as her story of how she was driven to become a psychologist to learn more about her condition. super insightful & inspiring!
0I DNFd it; it didn't capture me a quarter of the way through the book. It did feel super scripted, and I couldn't attribute it to an inexperienced author since it felt like she was manipulating the story (embellishing a boring detail with with scripted conversation, or downplaying a serious event). I didn't have her intonations to guide me emotionally since I wasn't listening to the audiobook version, and her writing style did not convey any emotional depth.
4Phew this was a whirlwind. Gagne's memoir dives into her struggles as a sociopath trying to lead a non-violent life and is ultimately a plea for empathy towards sociopaths, challenging the stereotype that they’re inherently dangerous. But, there are issues. Gagne admits to altering names, timelines, and dialogue, which can sometimes make scenes feel more scripted than genuine, like she’s retroactively applying adult wisdom to her past. Some episodes feel overly dramatic, like a movie finale setup - but I do appreciate how entertaining this was despite the subject matter. That being said, I wonder if my skepticism is influenced by her being a sociopath? Especially listening to the audiobook, there were places where her laugh and tone came off as "sociopath attempting charm" - but I immediately questioned myself. Am I thinking that because I *know* she's a sociopath? In the end, the book's flaws are overshadowed by its impact. It got me questioning my own biases and considering the perspective of a sociopath, which is no small feat.
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