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Julie Murphy meets Casey McQuiston in this unforgettable queer romance about a teen girl whose foray into fantasy tabletop roleplaying brings her new confidence, true friends, and a shot at real, swoon-worthy love. Hollis Beckwith isn’t trying to get a girl—she’s just trying to get by. For a fat, broke girl with anxiety, the start of senior year brings enough to worry about. And besides, she already has a Chris. Their relationship isn’t particularly exciting, but it’s comfortable and familiar, and Hollis wants it to survive beyond senior year. To prove she’s a girlfriend worth keeping, Hollis decides to learn Chris’s favorite tabletop roleplaying game, Secrets & Sorcery—but his unfortunate “No Girlfriends at the Table” rule means she’ll need to find her own group if she wants in. Enter: Gloria Castañeda and her all-girls game of S&S! Crowded at the table in Gloria’s cozy Ohio apartment, the six girls battle twisted magic in-game and become fast friends outside it. With her character as armor, Hollis starts to believe that maybe she can be more than just fat, anxious, and a little lost. But then an in-game crush develops between Hollis’s character and the bard played by charismatic Aini Amin-Shaw, whose wide, cocky grin makes Hollis’s stomach flutter. As their gentle flirting sparks into something deeper, Hollis is no longer sure what she wants…or if she’s content to just play pretend.
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I like the representation of a fat man character and one who has anxiety. I liked the group of ladies, how welcoming and fun and respectful they were, which functioned as a nice juxtaposition to the jerk Landon (game master of the boys group). And the boys reactions to some of what Hollis talks about-- that felt real to the misogynistic bullshit associated with D&D in real life.
I'm not sure how readers who have not played tabletop role-playing games will respond to this book, I'm not sure how reader friendly the role play sessions and in-game content is for someone who is inexperienced?
It felt like it took a long time for there to be any real stakes or tension, Hollis was just learning the rules and working to make friends. The setup was obvious /in the blurb, so you know that that is the drama of the second half, but the first half just felt a little bit slow plot-wise and pacing.
I loved how Hollis was discovering her own thoughts and her emotions via her character and using the role play with the others to explore that-- this felt so authentic and lovely to read, reminded me of the joy of D&D. I loved Hollis finding good quality people who accept her and how she comes to value their love and their relationships.
I really had fun seeing more and more snippets of the in-game story too, because it felt so true to see how Hollis would be more invested and think about it as she falls in love with the game and grows in her friendships.
I appreciated Hollis's questioning of who she is and how parts of her identity matter, I feel this is relatable to a reader of any age.
It was a cute little romance with Aini, I wanted more there on why exactly they cared for each other, but it was cute and sweet. I did feel that Hollis was emotionally cheating on Chris though.
Other reviewers point out that this is much more character driven over plot driven, and more coming-of-age over a romance story, and that the role-playing sessions / in-game bits were not for everyone. I do agree with others that it does take a very long time for the main character to both A) break up with Chris and also B) start standing up for herself / get some backbone. I liked that Hollis did not feel the need to define or label herself. Some reviewers point out that Chris and the boys were a little too much, or caricatures, or a bit villainous but even though it was over the top I found it weirdly believable too? Also, why was she even with Chris in a relationship? I understand the comfort and ease of being with a childhood friend, but this never really felt romantic and was potentially not needed in the story?