this list is not to be confused with mastication
self care romance books in all forms: mutual, solo, IRL, video call, phone, overhearing, walking in on, public space, etc etc.
if you hate the word ‘masturbation’, try: flicking the bean, jerking off, finger banging, rub one out, beat the meat, dj the vj, wanking, jerkin the gherkin, fapping; we can go on for days. whatever you call it, i just hope you reach climax ⛰️ toys encouraged but a hand (or two or three or-) will do just fine.
🫵 𝑔𝑜 𝒻𝓊𝒸𝓀 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻! 🫵 😇 gladly 😇






no third act breakup!
do you hate unnecessary heartache from couples deciding against all reason to breakup just to get back together two pages later? you're in the right place! all these books are safe from the third act breakup trope, but that doesn't mean they don't have angst and conflict!
greatly inspired by @beanchambers on tiktok
feel free to suggest books in the comments!






Cover Porn: The Romance Edition
Romance books to read for the aesthetic (usually cartoon covers because I’m trash for character art)






the 𝓂𝑒𝒶𝓉 is RAW
men raw dogging with no protection. the leads either consciously decide they want to have unprotected sex (bonus points if they tell each other they got tested and are clean), they dont have a condom available, or they 𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑔𝑒𝓉 to use one and realise after that they made an oopsie (± pregnancy). pretend STDs/STIs dont exist, ok? 🙂↕️






a delicious and nutritious salty treat
swallow his kids, or whatever 🤧 spunk, seed, semen, nut, cum, load, jizz, cream, ejaculate—whatever you call it, just ensure you swallow, dont spit. no further notes 🤭






Piercings? Where? There 😏
Books where at least one of the characters have piercings. Where? There! 🍆🍒👅 this list is not limited to humans 😈






AND he’s a nerd?!
For the men in the slutty little glasses- you know the ones. And are so pathetically down bad it’s sweet.






romance books where she is *pierced*
is it for pleasure? as an accessory? this list has it all!
no magnets allowed






Alliteration Adoration
Titles that feature alliteration and we love to see it. Recommendations requested to round out this remarkably ridiculous recital.






Cozy Fantasy
Cozy and magical, books you can curl up with and read about magical worlds, great storytelling, and otherworldly romance






I see dead people
In which a main character sees ghosts 👻






Girls Against Big Corps
These small-town romance are getting organized! It’s not just about falling in love, it’s about taking a stand. Each heroine goes toe-to-toe with the corporate machine, fighting to protect the local businesses and family legacies that make their town home. Who doesn’t love a good romance and a little anti-corporate rebellion?






My love language is when he makes her food
If the male character takes the time to cook or feed her, I WILL BE ON MY KNEES! That is the kind of care and thoughtfulness that I just eat up. It's not necessarily golden retriever energy. It's proactive and nuturing. Pls pls pls drop recs in the comments.






Paranormal Romance
Book Attic






It's a Silly Goofy Afterlife 🔪
I can never resist a quirky story about life on the other side. 👻 Whether it’s a murder mystery, a bubblegum horror, or even a sweet romance, there’s something irresistible about seeing it all from a ghost’s POV. I love how kooky and creative these versions of the afterlife can be and it makes the fight for a second chance even more engaging. If you loved The Good Place, School Spirits or Dead Boy Detectives, you’ll have so much fun with these too!






fellas let me hear you!
a list of books where men moan and whimper and basically do anything other than hump silently until they grunt when they finish
this isn't quite the same as dirty talk or talking their partner through it, it's more about the wordless noises they can't help but make in the moment 😉
I'll take any suggestions for this one, I need more books like this in my life






HOT is in the Job Title 👨🏻🚒
A list for all of the unique occupations I didn't realize were hot until now 🥵 For example, Hot Farmboy, Hot Baker, Hot Upholsterer. Let me know any book recs & their job titles in the comments 💬 Has anyone read a Hot Zamboni driver? I definitely had a vision when I visited the ice rink in Central Park lol






Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy
Yeehaw






uh, ha. boo?
a definitely not exhaustive list of books containing ghosts, ghost hunters (professional and amateur) and those that can see them/are haunted by them. this list contains middle grade, YA and adult fiction.
for those of us who grew up loving Casper and never quite moved on.
recs welcome🫶