Oliver Harding does not believe in collapse. He believes in systems. In data. In preparation. When his divorce is finalized and his job quietly disappears within the same week, he does what he has always done in moments of he makes a plan. The plan is simple. He will walk. From the Mediterranean to the high passes of the Mercantour, Oliver sets out alone, equipped with good boots, precise maps, and a mind accustomed to control. The trail is less interested in control. Heat, altitude, and distance begin to do what grief could they interrupt him. They slow him. They insist on the body. By the time he meets Julien, a French mountain guide whose quiet competence unsettles more than it reassures, Oliver has learned how to endure the mountains. He has not yet learned how to be seen inside them. What develops between them will ask for something Oliver has never staying visible when it costs him. Set against the vast geometry of alpine valleys and stone refuges, How We Became Ourselves is a restrained, intimate novel about competence and vulnerability, about the difference between movement and change, and about the long, difficult work of allowing another person to witness who we are without performance.