"It was the perfect texture. Soft, wet. Invasive." In the not-too-distant future, the melting of glaciers introduces a new threat into the world: xenopillars, carnivorous terrestrial worms the size of horses, armed with slime and hallucinogenic acid. Harrowing? Not nearly as harrowing as high school. It may be the apocalypse, but eighteen-year-old Hal Nieffer has bigger things to worry about—like bumping up his rank in Valorant and securing a date to prom. It's only when a freak encounter with a xenopillar at an abandoned convenience store leaves him disfigured that Hal discovers a dangerous method of self-soothing. And finds eroticism somewhere he really shouldn't.