“Company policy forbids me from exchanging my blood, my soul, or my firstborn child with customers…” When Ross starts working third-shift at a gas station, he doesn’t think anything extraordinary will happen. He expects a lot of quiet shifts. Well, you know what they say about assumptions. One explosion later and he’s the personal assistant to a vampire—who he admits is not only sexy, but the sane one—in charge of his supernatural clan’s paperwork, and managing any trouble the members get into. Spoiler alert: the clan can get into quite a bit of trouble. Ross is definitely not paid enough for this. Tags: The crack ship armada sails again, and then it got out of hand, poor put upon retail workers, Ross didn’t deserve this, Fate is cruel, so am I, the trauma of changing jobs, Ross has a paperclip and knows how to use it, Ross isn’t clear if he’s a PA, bartender, or babysitter, troublesome werewolves, Australian wizards, spells gone awry, very awry, sexy vampires, developing relationship, coming out, not a single degree of chill from Glenn where Ross is concerned, slow burn, boss/secretary, light bondage, Ross has to teach ancient mythical beings how to text, pray for him, SHENANIGANS, did I mention crack?, the most absurd workplace romance in history