What has Beth's girlfriend ordered in the plainest, squarest, most non-descript parcel? It certainly isn't books. No-one shuffles that frantically to hide books when you come in unexpectedly. And what would any right-minded person do when they opened the kitchen drawer to check what had been hidden? But right-minded isn't a term that's often applied to Beth. The Dildo in the Kitchen Drawer is a short story of paranoia, slippery fingers and recalcitrant dogs.