Alice has quite a story to tell you. That's not her real name, of course. she couldn't give her real name, not after all the things she reveals about herself in this book. All of her... adventures. And all that killing. She wouldn't want the police to find her, now would she? — It started out so nice. Alice was house-sitting for her friend, enjoying having the whole place to herself, with the sunken bathtub and big-screen television. But everything went wrong that first night, when she looked out the window and saw a strange man jumping naked into the swimming pool. Alice just knew he would be coming to get her, like all those other men before. But she would never be a victim again. Not after she remembered the old Civil War saber hanging in the living room...