i’ve been buddy reading with some pals and we’ve been analyzing twilight with the author’s mormon roots in mind and i’m at the meadow scene and it seems very much like an analogy for the temptation of sex

i’m not closely familiar with mormonism as a religion but i know they typically are supposed to wait until marriage. anyway, when bella was analyzing edward’s sparkly hand and she was tantalized by the smell of his breath, coming closer to smell it (?), he immediately withdrew like 20 feet away and i thought that the closeness gave him a vampy boner lol

then he started doing the vampy zoomies and showing bella how amazing of a predator he is, and then tells her “don’t be afraid” and saying he can control himself - is this not symbolism of perhaps wanting to experience sex for the first time and abstaining from the temptation of this pre-marital sin?

everything that leads up to this moment is so cult-like in my opinion because of how bella is immediately drawn to this man and thinks the world of him from the 1-2 interactions they’ve had, and her obsession of edward and the forced ignorance of all the signs that tell her she’s not safe, just so she can be with this man—the mormon cult series i watched on hulu described this exact scenario lmao

i think it’s so sad to see bella not be able to form an adult version of herself apart from being her mother’s responsible caretaker or her father’s burden, and then quickly molding into someone dependent on edward and his existence. we don’t get to see too much of her personality outside these roles, and it’s no wonder tweens, teens, and young adults (myself included) were completely enchanted by this relationship when it first came out, bc we related ourselves with bella’s vulnerable state and self-consciousness, who was then able to find someone who was willing to hold himself back from temptation just bc he loves her so much 🥴

also the way stephenie tries to write bella to be not like other girls is so obtuse that it interferes with any character development she could’ve had. she had to write bella to be different from other minds that edward has read bc she wants him to be surprised by bella’s decisions, that she makes those decisions bafflingly stupid lol—JUST to emphasize that bella has a uniqueness to her that he’ll never understand, and that curiosity is a big part of why edward is entranced with her.

anyone else have other thoughts on these points? i’ve been enjoying reading with a critical eye but still being pleasantly nostalgic about it 🤭