This Monster of Mine

This Monster of Mine

Shalini Abeysekara

Enjoyment: 5.0Quality: 5.0Characters: 5.0Plot: 5.0
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2 ratings โ€ข 1 post

She knows the taste of death. He'll stoke her hunger for it. Eighteen-year-old Sarai doesn't know why someone tried to kill her four years ago, but she does know that her case was closed without justice. Hellbent on vengeance, she returns to the scene of the crime as a Petitor, a prosecutor who can magically detect lies, and is assigned to work with Tetrarch Kadra. Ice-cold and perennially sadistic, Kadra is the most vicious of the four judges who rule the land - and the prime suspect in a string of deaths identical to Sarai's attempted murder. Certain of his guilt, Sarai begins a double life: solving cases with Kadra by day and plotting his ruin by night. But Kadra is charming and there's something alluring about the wrath he wields against the city's corruption. So when the evidence she finds embroils her in a deadly political battle, Sarai must also fight against her attraction to Kadra - because despite his growing hold on her heart, his voice matches the only memory she has of her assailant... A dazzling Ancient Rome-inspired romantasy debut, This Monster of Mine is a bloodbath of manipulation, deception, and forbidden love.

Publication Year: 2025


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  • Thoughts from 36% (page 145)

    Oh wow. This is not only intriguing and hooked me immediately this is so GOOD! Like I thought I'd already peaked this year with gifted and talented but this has completely side swiped me out of left field. Was not expecting to be as hooked. Did I expect to enjoy it. Yes. Did I expect this to ruin my plans for the next day or so and want to call in sick at work. No not really but here we are xD

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  • Crim_321
    May 02, 2025
    Enjoyment: Quality: Characters: Plot:

    ~~Thank you to NetGalley and Hodder & Stoughton for the ARC!~~

    3.5/5 stars rounded up!

    Wow, what a pleasant surprise. A dark, twist sort of pleasant, but pretty great, nonetheless!

    I feel like calling this a romantasy is misleading, because while Sarai and Kadra's romance is important to the story, the mystery regarding Sarai's attempted murder and the conspiracy about the dead Petitors takes up much of the focus. A fact I will not complain about at all, for it went so much harder than I expected. It tackles abuse of power, particularly from the wealthy, discrimination, prejudice, misogyny, the true meaning of justice, I was thoroughly surprised how in depth these themes were debated and examined.

    The dynamic between our main duo was interesting, too. Kadra is obviously a messed up dude, but he also heavily respects Sarai and challenges her worldview repeatedly. His methods in doing so are questionable, especially because his tactics are to manipulate and withhold a lot of crucial info from her, but he does develop out of that after Sarai calls him out on it. Sarai herself does match his freak in being equally, if not more, messed up. Between the multiple angles of discrimination she faces and the debilitating trauma she experiences from her fall, the girl goes through a lot. Her choices are never perfect, obviously, but they're perfectly in line for her character. It certainly doesn't hinder her intellect or justice sensitivity, especially when it comes to solving her own mystery. These two made a wonderful dynamic as they bounced on/off each other. The guy literally murders for her and she's still down to makeout with him. Honestly? Good for her.

    The only element I found lacking was the worldbuilding. I understood it's based off ancient Rome, but the constant use of Latin threw me. There was this one 'H' swear they kept on using, and I had no idea what it meant. There are multiple gods who people worship, but there's also the indication there are saints due to a nickname a side character gets. I also didn't wrap my head around the physical realm of the world besides the whole northern vs. southern bit. Maybe I would understand it better if I ever reread this in the future.

    All in all, this was a solid debut from Abeysekara. I kind of hope whatever she publishes next will take place in this world again. Not only for worldbuilding purposes, but I do see a lot of potential in further exploration. I definitely will be keeping an eye out!

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  • DarkRumours
    Apr 25, 2025
    Enjoyment: 5.0Quality: 5.0Characters: 5.0Plot: 5.0
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    To say this was phenomenal is an understatement. This debut novel by Shalini Abeysekara was a work of art. I loved every moment of it. This is slated to be a duology and I intend to preorder and devour the second book the moment it hits the shelf. I digress slightly. The book has an easy to understand magic system, mystery and political intrigue as well as a sizzling main male character who is morally bleak in all the right ways. The main female character is strong willed, intelligent and unlike most novels not stunningly attractive. It is a refreshing romantasy that does not fall into the typical clichรฉs. The book had me hooked from start to finish. I saw the twists a mile off but I didn't mind that predicatibility the prose flowed beautifully and it was a joy to read. Trigger page included in the front of this novel, always worth researching before starting. Keep your mind healthy and happy while reading please!

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