This was a challenging and illuminating read. Challenging, because a lot of the science and some of the anarchist principles went totally over my head. Illuminating, because it made me question what I knew and how I felt about individualism vs. collectivism.

Things I liked: I enjoyed the characters, especially the more complex ones (the ones that didn't seem to fit in on either Urras or Anarres). The protagonist's physical and intellectual journeys and his growth as a character were so interesting, and sometimes it felt like we were both connecting the dots at the same time. I was hooked on the overall story--what would it look like for an anarchist to experience capitalism for the first time?-- and the messages/takeaways I was able to glean were compelling.

What was harder was, sometimes literally, just reading the words. I felt stymied by the writing style, which was too formal and too technical for my taste. It made me think of all the old-school, male, white science-fiction writers and I was surprised that Le Guin sounded a lot like those voices here. I wonder how much of that was intentional (part of the book's meta-message, perhaps?) vs. just how she wrote back then. So it took me about a quarter of the book to really feel engaged.

There's a lot I still need to unpack and this book is at the top of my re-read list, but overall I learned a lot and I'm looking forward to continuing my exploration of Le Guin's other work.

This was an intensely dark and emotional memoir, more so than I expected (see content warnings below). I admire and respect Gay's vulnerability in sharing some really horrific experiences that shaped much of who she is (both literally and figuratively). I feel this way each time I read a memoir or an autobiography; I don't know that I could be so open or transparent about my life.

Gay's writing is eloquent and masterful and able to convey so much feeling through both the words and narration. That said, I do think the chapters could have been organized a little better. Gay jumps around from topic to topic and though there were some clear throughlines, some of the transitions felt a bit erratic.

I appreciated how this memoir was both a way for Gay to understand herself and be understood by others. For example, she highlights society's many (false, misconstrued) narratives about fat people-- that they are unskilled, unintelligent, unfeeling, uncaring-- and how she internalized some of those feelings. She talks about how society both sees and doesn't see fat bodies, and how she feels both hyper-visible and invisible, sometimes at the same time.

Overall, this was a challenging and thought-provoking memoir, and I'm eager to jump into some of Gay's other writings.

Content warnings: Graphic - Rape, Eating disorder, Fatphobia Moderate - Racism, Sexual assault, Body shaming Minor - Vomit, Biphobia, Suicidal thoughts