I think it was inevitable that I wouldn't like this novel because Boy represents the type of Filipinos I hate. He is a vain, social climbing, white-supremacist Filipino and he danced with the devil too hard without even noticing it's the devil. I understand his background and why he is the way that he is, why he looks down on the Philippines and why he looked up to the US so much, I see Filipinos like that all the time and at least his character was realistic, but understanding is not the same as agreeing. I do not agree with his worldview and I think he is a victim of the worst thing the US has done to the Philippines and that is the colonialist mindset.

I liked this novel and the chemistry between Regan and Aldo is irresistible and, honestly, it's the one thing that kept me going until the end. Them trying to understand each other under the course of six conversations (and a few more encounters in between but those don't count of course) is a cute concept and since it's a character driven novel it works, it doesn't really need to go beyond the two characters' relationship with themselves and their family. I enjoyed the fair amount of spice too and I think the writing, in some parts, is eloquent and poetic.

I liked this novel, but I didn't love it. I read the acknowledgement after I finished reading the novel and I understand the author's sentiment, but Regan throughout the novel really just hated therapy and medication. I understand where Regan is coming from but at the same time, I was just frustrated how she dreaded her privilege of having access to therapy and medication, like the author really spent a lot of time letting me know that she DOESN'T want that, and I get that therapy is not a one-size-fits-all solution and it can take a long time to find the right therapist (same goes with medication) but I was left with the impression that therapy is a waste of time. Aldo feels aimless. Like he's a textbook genius but he pretty much just takes whatever life throws at him. Outside of his relationship with Regan, he reminds me of a bland Sheldon Cooper with the same amount of rudeness but since he's perceived as handsome, he gets away with it, I guess.

They are both a mess in their own right, and I think they perfectly represent the words Chaotic Evil (Regan) and Chaotic Neutral (Aldo), and sometimes I can get on board with that and enjoy their flaws, but sometimes I'm just so annoyed with them and especially Regan. There are parts in the novel where it was so poetic and moving and then right after it feels like I'm reading a Wattpad novel about two teenagers who don't know how to live properly without having sex, like in some chapters that's literally all they do and tried to convince me that it's love.

I think my main issue with this novel is that it convinced me of their chemistry, but not of their relationship. In the end it still feels like they just met, their only character development to me was that they realized all those times they were talking, living together, getting to know their families, and having sex, actually meant that they loved each other, who would've guessed! I just feel like once you take a step back and look at their relationship from afar, it just looks immature and toxic, but damn do they sound good together.

My first Mieko Kawakami novel and it's going to be stuck in my head for the rest of the year. 5/5. I think this is one of those novels that can be really hard to love because of how raw and unhinged it can be. There are moments in this novel that placed me into a void, where I need to sit and ponder the psychology of the characters (most notably Natsuko, Makiko, Midoriko and also Yuriko). It is a deep and uncomfortable exploration of societal pressures on women, sexual trauma, poverty, loneliness, and even anti-natalism and nihilism to some extent. Each character is facing their own struggles, and they're portrayed realistically in a sense that their problems don't just magically go away in the end. You're left with the feeling that it will still be there, it's a journey you'll have to take for the rest of your life, but you won't always be alone in it.