exploringthestacks's Book Journey

(No star ratings because I’m not sure how to boil my thoughts down into a number of stars for this one)

Truthfully, I don’t know how to describe my feelings about this book. It wasn’t enjoyable, per se, but it was very compelling. Jaycee’s story is of course heartbreaking, but her grit and determination to survive left me in awe for much of the book. I was particularly moved by her determination to educate her daughters as much as possible while they were in captivity. Her reunion with her mom, sister, and aunt moved me to tears and I felt overwhelmed with happiness for them that they got to be reunited.

Something that struck me over and over again was how young Jaycee’s voice sounded in the text. In the beginning, she’s very clear that how she wrote her story is how she remembers it, which is why there are some parts where the narrative feels confusing. I admire her ability to share her story in such an authentic way. Because there was very little editing, the tone is undeniably, for lack of a better word, juvenile. It underscores the utter horror of her story because it reflects the young age at which she was taken, as well as the denial of her continued education for 18 years. Her experiences turned my stomach, and her tone turned it again because of how young she sounds.

I always have such mixed feelings when it comes to memoirs like this. On one hand, this was an incredibly difficult read and I have to protect my own mental health. On the other hand, I do feel an obligation to bear witness to these stories, especially when it’s coming from the person who experienced it. Jaycee wanted to tell her story, and she talks about a big reason being that it meant Phillip and Nancy Garrido couldn’t hide from their actions anymore after she put everything out in the open. I appreciate the power and agency that Jaycee got from telling her story, and I’m glad that she eventually got to a place where she felt comfortable and safe to tell her story. After reading this book, I am curious to see how Jaycee grew and adjusted back to her life, so I’m curious about her second memoir, though I think it’ll be some time before I’m ready to read that one.