I've actually watched the adaptation first before reading this one. Of course, watching it had made me read this, though I don't thoroughly enjoyed the story, I love how realistic and humane the characters are. There were moments I could relate to them and kept asking myself: if given their situations, would I have reacted the way they did or it depends as we all are individuals with different personalities. 

This book tackles more on the characters personalities and situations and doesn't really depend on the plot. I think the plot depends on the characters very much.
Though, admittedly, reading the book made me understand them better, like there were moments from the show that seemed ambiguous, though reading this does that too but by reading this, there's a specific certainty that that was the understanding. 

Kept thinking about how to review this book, as it was told chronologically and just by dates told in chapters and if there was something that happened, it was told in a flashback. I felt like I was also watching the adaptation whilst reading this. 

I think, I would like to discuss more about the characters here, particularly our protagonists, Marianne Sheridan and Connell Waldron. 

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Firstly, their personalities are somewhat unlikable but I love their humaneness and their vulnerability. The way they were written are so humane that I felt like I was inside of them, being able to read and savor their thoughts. They are role models characters in a way that you get to learn something from them. Also, they felt genuinely real, maybe even someone that someone can relate to. 

Connell for me embodied the term "nice guy". He is a nice guy but that doesn't mean he was good or kind person for that matter. This was shown through the years of interaction with him and Marianne. During their years in high school, though he didn't bully Marianne (he also didn't stop others from bullying her except that one time when Marianne was assaulted during a party but they were ready fucking that time), he did somewhat taken advantage of her, setting a parameter between him and her so called relationship that seems to involve only around sex and that Marianne should never ever tell anyone about it. Then somehow he felt bad when Marianne stopped going to school altogether when he invited Rachel to the Debs (somehow the way he tried to evade any responsibility about that and acted somehow felt like a manipulation or gaslight though I don't know if it was for the people around him or maybe to himself). Later in college he met Marianne and their lives are entangled again but this time there's a huge gap between them as it has been now evident in his consciousness their massive disparity on their social classes. Though I don't like how he initially treated Marianne, specially emotionally, he knows he has to work om himself and he did. Just like how Marianne describe him at the end that his life has opened into new and different directions which also offers that Connell will be shaped and changed into something different. Hopefully something good different. 

On Marianne's, I just feel generally sorry for her. Admittedly, I also feel incredulous the way that she lets Connell treated her at the beginning and then whilst reading, you slowly understand the psyche that had led her to grow the way she is. Unfortunately, just like the rest of us, it's also up to Marianne to heal herself. It's just that somehow, as it was evident that both characters were academically smart, both of them unfortunately are dense and are unintelligible emotionally. A lot of their issues stems from miscommunication. Connell giving vague comments and Marianne giving apathetic response. But both of them shows their vulnerabilities to one another, though there's openness between them, if still puzzles the readers how they could miscommunicate the way they did in the book. Sometimes I think, their socio-economic class did affect their interaction somehow as Marianne is comfortable whilst Connell is struggling. Probably why Connell felt he had to continually prove himself, not just because of his class status but also because of the reputation that envelops him and his mother. Marianne, though, knows there is disparity between their social classes, acts that it doesn't affect her but there are this subtle hints, that sometimes comes off as ignorant and insensitive to Connell, such as that scholarship grant in their school or that she could somehow slack off of her future, not just because she doesn't know yet what she'll be but also because she has the security of her money. 

I think the reason that Marianne wasn't able to discern's people's intentions towards her was because of her family situation. This was evident when she realized Peggy and Jaime's true colors when Joanna gave her opinion. Probably why on early of her and Connell's relationship, she also tolerated Connell's attitude towards her. 

I also loved that as flawed as they were, both Connell and Marianne recognized their flaws and tried to improve themselves to be better. For instance, as nearing the end, Connell realized how he had the hold between his and Marianne relationship and how also over the years he also tend it and took it to his advantage. By recognizing this pattern, he was able to improve himself to be a better person, to be an actual good friend to Marianne, trying to understand her and constantly proving that he loved Marianne and that Marianne is loved. For Marianne, during her stay on Sweden, we then finally see how she finally realize and acknowledge her feelings, like the way others treated her (such as Peggy, Jaime and Lucas) was not what she was supposed to be treated as. Slowly, she was able to acknowledge the trauma she endured in her family and was able to stop avoiding it but confront it finally, that the treatment she received from these people and her family are not because of who she is but rather of who are they themselves. She was able to break the cycle of enduring the pain but acting nonchalantly but confronting it and wanting to heal herself. 

Also, there were scenes from the adaptation that didn't much make sense to me that finally made sense after reading. Like Lukas as he was just briefly introduce and it felt like Marianne also tolerated his treatment of her and that somehow, these rumors about Marianne liking it when people hurt her was shown in the adaptation but it bug me because I don't think Marianne really did that (but in the book, there was some certainty that she didn't, she just stayed quiet and endured it). Another one was Connell's relationship with Helen seems so abrupt in the adaptation but the book explore that further. Which actually helped to add some character to Helen and what her significance to Connell's life and in his relationship with Marianne. I think, Helen was Connell's safe choice. Like if he was like 'normal people', he would end up with Helen and they would have a normal life. But there's this magnetic pull between him and Marianne, that even if they seemed to not get in touch, once they see each other, both of them couldn't help themselves but fall back into their dynamic. 

Whilst reading, I also wonder why the title was Normal People and was it because both of them think unlike most 'normal' people? But I can't help but think that they are normal people and maybe people just had this notion that sometimes they aren't 'normal' enough for societal expectations. Also, I think Connell is really severely anxious while Marianne is depressed. Somehow, as Connell's anxiety worsens, he had thoughts of actually killing himself which made me think: Connell wants to die while Marianne does not want to live and I know it felt like they are the same thing but I assure you not. Whilst Connell wants to die because of her crippling anxiety near the end of the book, Marianne does not want to live as she tolerated the way people treat her, like she's giving up. She already felt like a ghost, constantly wandering amongst the crowd. 

Though one big question comes to mind was do Marianne and Connell loved each other or was it just their co-dependency and the fact that they've know each other for a long time that they've confused it with romance? I liked to think that in the end, it was more of the former. I think it is, but there is this uncertainty if just like before, will they be able to get back to one's another lives or will their roads goes completely away from each other? Though we aren't shown their actually healed selves, I loved that the ending insinuated that kind of path, that we've seen how much they suffered and endured those pain and now they are in their healing journey.
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