It turns out the crackers I stole are the body of Christ. After eating more than half the bag, I googled the cracker brand and learned that I paired marble Cracker Barrel cheese with God's transubstantiated body. I had originally googled the crackers so I could leave them a review. I planned to write: BORING. Whoever created these is unimag-inative. These crackers are tasteless and bland.

😂😂😂😂

🎇 I don't think she really cares if I'm fine. She just wants to tell me about her husband, and her house, and her plans. She wants to be validated, to feel good about herself. She wants to prove to me that her existence matters. I wonder how I can signal to her that she's succeeded. It's strange that I am able to give her any kind of validation. Who am I to her? Why does she care what I think of her? I don't even remember her. I can't think of anything she could say to me that would validate me. She could tell me I'm the most interesting, important, beautiful, successful person that she has ever laid her sorry eyes on and it would mean as much to me as if it came from someone trying to get me to join their pyramid scheme. Jane? Clara? 🎇

It me until my late thirties to understand that insight.

I find it so bizarre that I occupy space, and that I am seen by other pope. Ife like l am falling through space and Eleanor just threw me ams. It's such a sweet, pointless gesture. It would be less devastating to fall through space alone, without someone else falling next to me. Whenever someone does something nice for me, I feel intensely aware of how strange and sad it is to know someone. She beams. "Of course I remember the things you say."

Oof, that hit close to home.

I search my mind for the animal I imagine Giuseppe would find the least likable. "Maybe a pig, "Oh, interesting—the boar," he replies. "That represents abun-dance, and fertility."

🤦‍♀️ Dude, she’s not into you.

“I am enraptured by how entertained Eleanor is by this movie. She thinks I'm laughing at the movie, but I'm not—I'm laughing because I am endeared by her. I'm looking at her exposed gummy smile and listening to her quack with laughter. I find it so endearing, it becomes difficult for me to inhale. My vision is blurred in tears, and I am incapable of speech.”

My heart. 🥹❤️👩🏼‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏼