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Empire of AI: Dreams and Nightmares in Sam Altman's OpenAI
Karen Hao
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Guardian: Zhen Hun (Novel) Vol. 1
Priest Priest
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Angels After Man
Rafael NicolƔs
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How Are You Peeling?
Saxton Freymann
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Chasing Lolita: How Popular Culture Corrupted Nabokov's Little Girl All Over Again
Graham Vickers
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ā ļøĀ Major trigger warning for CSA ā ļø
(4.25/5)
Iām sure no one is surprised to hear that this book is an extremely uncomfortable and difficult read. But honestly, I was surprised by how awful it was for me. I have read many books full of horrifying shit: abuse, trauma, you name it. I also work as a trauma therapist for a living and have many clients who have experienced sexual abuse in childhood. And yet, I truly was not prepared for how terrible it would feel to take a deep dive into the mind of the abuser Humbert Humbert.
Still, despite the discomfort of reading this level of moral depravity, I think this is a remarkable work of literature. Nabokov wanted to honestly and truthfully depict the mindset that leads a pedophile to sexually abuse a child and I think he accomplished that. This was an extremely believable and realistic representation of a pedophile narcissistic abuser, which is also what made it so vile. At no point is Nabokov presenting Humbert as a morally ambiguous or sympathetic character. He is very unambiguously a horrible person and the reader is never meant to feel anything but disgusted and horrified by him. At no point did this feel like it was romanticizing or justifying abuse. Anyone who says otherwise about this book has either not read it, or deeply misunderstood its intentions.
Getting more into specifics:
I think Nabokovās choice to frame this novel with the fictional foreword, which presents Humbertās confessional to come as the work of a criminal, to be studied as a psychological case study, effectively sets up the reader to understand that this is the work of an unreliable narrator. Humbert is immediately introduced as someone the reader should not trust at their word and has already been convicted for their crimes. In fact, Humbert wrote the entire story from solitary confinement, which also adds crucial context for understanding why he tells the story of his abuse in the way he does.
Throughout his (fictional) autobiography, Humbert continuously attempts to justify and explain his behavior, many times even speaking directly to the reader, imploring them to have sympathy for his ādifficult affliction.ā He states that he never wanted to hurt Dolores Haze, that he tried to prevent as much harm coming to her as possible, and other ludicrous and absurd statements that completely contradict his actions. He attempts to show off his intellect, hoping to convince the reader that he is smart, well-read, and cultured, and thus the abuse he perpetrated onto Dolores cannot be that bad. He brags about his appearance, with random interjections about how the reader must remember how handsome he was, how women threw themselves at him, how even Dolores herself was attracted to him. Unfortunately for Humbert, all of these attempts at manipulation only serve to make him look even more evil, insidious, and selfish. Nabokov perfectly encapsulates the mental gymnastics that abusers will do to tell themselves that what they have done is not that bad.
Humbert dehumanizes the children he is attracted to by referring to them as ānymphetsā and sometimes even ādemons,ā which enables him to believe that whatever he does to these girls is not inhumane. He takes no interest in Dolores as a person and his interest in her is exclusively based on physical appearance. He spends long sections of the book describing various aspects of her appearance, but gives barely a passing thought to what she likes, what she dreams about, or what she feels about anything that isn't him. When Dolores begins to struggle because of the severe trauma she is experiencing, Humbert is frustrated by how her emotional dysregulation is an inconvenience to him. Everything in his mind is about his own personal gain, to the complete disregard of everyone else around him.
Living in Humbertās mind felt gross and I hated every minute of it. But that doesn't make this a bad book, and I think that distinction matters. Still, it was a struggle to get through and I could not wait for it to be over. I definitely would not recommend everyone to read this, and honestly Iām still deciding if it was worth it.
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The Boy in the Red Dress
Kristin Lambert
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Goldie Vance #1 (Goldie Vance, #1)
Hope Larson
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Murder by Memory (Dorothy Gentleman, 1)
Olivia Waite
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Did not know what to expect from a midevil horror, but itās very fun so far!!!
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The Red Market: On the Trail of the World's Organ Brokers, Bone Thieves, Blood Farmers, and Child Traffickers
Scott Carney
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Dinosaurs at the Dinner Party: How an Eccentric Group of Victorians Discovered Prehistoric Creatures and Accidentally Upended the World
Edward Dolnick