I had already read this book when it came up as a readalong book but decided to reread it for one very key reason: I first read it in February 2022. I remembered very little of the book beyond the premise. I remembered not liking it much. And yet. I rated it 5 stars.

Why did you do that, Past Liz? I didn’t know. And I needed to know. The mystery was eating at me, and the explanation, while true enough, that I am not the same woman that I was in 2022, was not a complete enough answer.

And so I set about my quest. I have updated my rating. I think all of us mature in our reading over time and with practice and experience, and… I am just so so so far removed from 2022 Liz. And that’s fine! I just had not remembered that 2022 Liz was someone who would give 5 stars to a book she didn’t love.

After and during rereading, I saw what a lot of folks had been pointing to, that the book has a very narrow target audience (that a progressive millennial woman from California does not fit into), and that it is gratuitously violent and does not really have satisfying character growth or reflection. There are sections that are written very unevenly. This is what I didn’t like back then, too, but Past Liz was not really talking to other folks about books or analyzing what she read that deeply and did not have the language to express that.

I suspect that a Boomer or perhaps Gen X man who enjoys action movies and buddy comedies (yeah ok I am describing my own dad) might really enjoy the book.

So why the 5 stars? Did I figure it out? Believe it or not, I think I might have. I suspect that Past Liz felt that while quite intense and yet shallow, the book was addressing an uncomfortable and important reality (homophobia and racism and the ways that might be expressed in the South albeit against an unrealistic plot), and gave the book 5 stars for being Important™️.

I have since rereading this one also reread a book for a readalong that I remembered nothing about except that I really loved it in high school. And now, I thought it was… fine! Honestly kind of eager to reread more often and see how my thoughts and taste have evolved (that is not to imply that my thoughts/taste are necessarily better now, liking this book and other books that I didn’t is totally valid!!)

So anyway, here is to PB and all of you for making me a more thoughtful reader!