4.25 stars (all the 4s are acc 4.25 here) || Oh how fun, mysterious, tender! I love the author’s imagination and writing. I loved theorising and analysing — finding all the parallels, layers and clues. As another review says, there were plenty “blink and you’ll miss it” moments; I was surprised several times.

It’s so much more than a cosy “love yourself” book, and even that aspect is uniquely done. The story is thoughtfully crafted and clearly very personal. CAJ has created a cast of characters that are layered, occasionally unlikable and wholly loveable. I saw myself, or others I know, in several. This was a bittersweet, but ultimately beautiful, experience. CAJ is undeniably talented.

I do think Theodora’s Tea Shop is slightly mis-marketed. Yes, it’s technically cosy but the stakes are way higher and the story is darker than I anticipated. It was sadder and there were violent deaths — be warned!

I truly loved this story, though unfortunately less so towards the end. Sooooo much happens — I loved that, at first, but I was eventually overwhelmed. Additionally, something happens towards the end that made me very upset; it felt unnecessary, for pure shock-value/tears, and thus very cheap. This definitely coloured the rest of my experience and my ratings. (If this hadn’t happened, this would have been 4.5 stars, 5 stars for enjoyment and would have gone on My Taste.)

Despite that, this story has stayed with me. I have ME/CFS and I’m autistic, too — like Dot. I really enjoyed this rep, seeing my experiences on-page and knowing that it’s possible for me to have adventures again one day too. 🧿 That there’s a future and possibility and hope. 🧿 Dot is accepting of her capacity, even at the start (though moreso at the end), and I really needed to see this. I’ve been asking myself “What would Dot do?”, and the answer is always “rest”. I’m learning to extend myself the same compassion and patience Dot does to herself come the end of the book. So, I am very grateful I read this. And even though I truly (personally) hated that thing at the end, Theodora’s Tea Shop has a special place in my heart. And overall a very lovely, magical, warm read. Thank you, CAJ.

Hunt the Ever Wild is dark, it’s magical, it’s philosophical. I was gripped. I couldn’t sleep, my thoughts on the story — the good and the bad. I loved the sociopolitical critique, I loved the hunt and the suspense. I couldn’t guess what would happen, and I wanted to know as soon as possible.

The writing is introspective, poetic, and romantic. But sometimes confusing. It was hard to follow thought processes, subtext wasn’t always clear, and some things felt random.

The characters and world sometimes felt confusing too: hazy, vague, contradictory… Come the end, I realised (most of) this was intentional, part of its sociopolitical critique. We didn’t have all the answers because the characters didn’t either — knowledge was hoarded by metaphorical dragons (read: people and institutions of power). The magic system was vague and contradictory (until the end) because those in power did not want us to understand. Perhaps they didn’t understand as much as they said they did, either.

This book is so leftist. One of its points is that no one person has the right to determine the fate of the world. Thus, its hazy world-building reminded me of this passage from Magical/Realism: Essays on Music, Memory, Fantasy, and Borders (thank you @crybabybea for posting this in that forum).

Fantasy, sci-fi, and speculative fiction in the West emphasize the importance of world-building in order for the story to "work." The writer plays god, mapping the land, territories, and histories of their characters' respective cultures and races as sites of discovery and conflict. World-building is an inherently colonial narrative position, which gives the author full omnipotence and control, not only as a god who creates the world in his image but as the single source of the story, the mind of the universe, and therefore the arbiter of what is "universal." Fantasy, sci-fi, and speculative fiction satisfy the imperial urge for full control of a world narrative and its interpretation, making the text the sole source of accurate lore and the devout reader the ultimate authority on the world's “canon." This empowers the phallogocentric reading we see in (often white, male) fans who self-deputize as authorities and police the laws of the world by restricting its interpretations as canon, non-canon, retcon, and headcanon.

However, the haziness did not seem intentional at all while reading, and instead like poor storytelling. Especially alongside the complicated writing style, the occasional way-too-convenient occurrence, and when some contradictions were never addressed. I was frustrated towards the end. (Very thankful the actual ending picked up and answered my questions!) I imagine some of these things are also because this is a debut novel (and a good one at that, mind you!); it’s a shame these weren’t caught during editing. BUT I’d like to clarify that I was not constantly confused or frustrated, this haziness was not ever-present.

As for the romance… I could see Sy and Anya as a couple, but I think they needed a slower burn…more time, more yearning, and more consistency. The pacing felt a little off and therefore not as believable as it could have been. Again, my confusion regarding the writing and characters didn’t help.

I liked the ending, as I said. It was fun. There were sweet, meaningful cyclical moments. It made me feel warm and philosophical.

Overall, I’d recommend Hunt the Ever Wild, especially if you’re into discussions of class and power, and can handle body horror. I did really enjoy it. Although it has its flaws, I think it more or less achieved what it set out to do. It is a story of metaphorical dragons and magical forests. Of survival and power — and lack thereof. Of humanity — and lack thereof, too. It feels like the author’s personal manifesto.

This manifesto consists of several parts, but I’d like to share just this one: maybe we’ll live our whole lives under oppressive systems, but we can do our best to do good, to be there for each other, to make sure we’re not giving more power to corrupt, tyrannical, violent institutions and figures. To not play the game as they want us to.

So, bask in beauty and delight. Paint it. And paint in a style deemed vulgar, common, proletariat. Adorn your home with said paintings, place wildflowers at the window. Begin again, even if it’s scary. Practice a little magic, even if it’s illegal. Look after your community, and those outside it who are less fortunate than you, even if you do not gain a single thing for it. Treasure what’s constant and what’s safe — life is ever-changing and always demanding, but these things will carry you. Feed and protect your community, even if the only way is to hunt on land a king declares he owns, because he doesn’t truly own it — how could he? The earth is far older and far more powerful than he. And…say thank you to that forest, give it gifts, respect its balance.

Thank you to NetGalley, the publisher and SE Kiser for an eARC in exchange for an honest review.