I thoroughly enjoyed this book and will defend it to the death, but fully expect others to enjoy it less. The plot does not have the typical beats of a fantasy novel and so will subvert a lot of readers' expectations. Additionally, while this is a sapphic book, the main character is bi and her relationships are more plot devices than they are central to the experience; because of that, the sapphic part may disappoint some readers and the MF part may disappoint them even more. For my taste, it was delicious and fed to me at just the right pace to make me yearn for more but was peripheral enough to let me focus on the magic like I wanted to.

TLDR: read this book for the magic and you'll be golden. Read it for the sapphic relationship and you're probably going to hate it.

Is this book absolutely perfect? No. But it is incredibly compelling and worth the page count for epic fantasy enjoyers. This book was quieter and more focused on political intrigue than some may enjoy, but I think this will be one of those books I always wish I could read again for the first time. I initially expected a little more action and intensity, but I came to really enjoy the pace and tone. Fitz was so much fun to get to know as a character and I look forward to seeing him grow and change throughout the series.

Holy shit this book was a journey. I started out intrigued and liking it, hated it for a while, then did a complete 180 at the very end and realized it's incredible. A lot of this had to do with my expectations for what this book was going to be, and I've realized my beef is not with the book itself, but with the marketing. This is NOT a love story. I'm sure there are people who'll read it as one and still love it (part of the brilliance of this book is that there are a few different interpretive avenues you could take with it), but to me, the years-spanning romance between Erica and Laure was anything but romantic, and I think the book is at its best if you choose to believe it's not supposed to be.

The main characters, when they first meet and fall for each other, are 18 and 24 years old. They have nothing in common except a love of art and an intense physical attraction. I wasn't convinced at all of the idea that they were compatible in any way, or would make each other happy long-term. Yet a lot of the book is about them being unable to quit the idea, even after years and years, that maybe they're supposed to be together. I found that incredibly frustrating to read about, because for most of the book I was convinced that the author was trying to make us believe it too.

But ultimately, that's not what this book is. It's about the choices that make a life, the way we're prone to yearning for these hypothetical lives we could've lived if we'd made one choice differently, and the futility of clinging to those almost-lives that probably wouldn't have even turned out how we imagine. It's a cautionary tale about letting your life be defined by missed opportunities. It's incredibly tragic, not because of the romance, but because of what the romance represents in the lives of these characters.

The writing was GORGEOUS and atmospheric and emotional, and it's what kept me reading during the sections where I was (mistakenly) frustrated with the story and characters. I also loved the depiction of late-20th century queer life and friendships, and the way the author made Paris leap off the page. The character work was excellent too, and the ending? Don't look at me. I've never had a reading experience like this before and I have a feeling I'll never read anything quite like it again.

as a 32-year-old woman working in advertising and reading this at the end of August, i can deeply relate 😂

I completely enjoyed the writing style, the characters and the setting. The ending was the pizza on top iykyk 🤭